Chad has been gone for 5 days so far this week. He will be home tomorrow afternoon. Although I am grateful to have that extra help when he returns home, I do want to say thank you to my children who really have been just wonderful this week. They have been helping, listening, forgiving, independent, kind, gotten up for school with hardly any extra coaxing on my part, and have tried their hardest to stay on task. Bless their hearts.
Chad traveling this year has been a very big trial for me. It's exhausting. I feel horrible at times for the kind of mother I am to my children.....raising my voice, ignoring them to be by myself for a while, counting to "3" too many times, putting them to bed at 7:00 pm, just to have extra time alone. There are times when I'm all alone when I just cry my eyes out and wonder when this is ever going to end or IS this ever going to end.
And then there are the times, more often than not, when I am close to my breaking point that I know there are angels around me to bare me up. I am so grateful for that. I'm grateful for the power of prayer. If I did not pray each day, it definitely shows in the type of mother and wife I am during the day. I know my Heavenly Father listens to me, knows my concerns and weaknesses, and I know He is there for me when I need him most. I'm grateful for supportive family and friends, where ever they may be who are constantly giving me words of encouragement. I'm grateful for the wonderful mothers that I know who are such an amazing example to me (especially my own mother). And I'm so very grateful that I have such a fabulous husband who knows what I'm going through and is concerned and loving and supportive. Who does his best to do what he can to make this process easier on me and who works hard so that I am able to stay home with my three amazing children.
By the end of every day (especially today) I am worn out, stressed and ready to call it quits. Then tonight, after tucking Charlie in to bed and saying goodnight to the girls, I went back in to see if Charlie was doing okay (we are having a scary thunderstorm). I laid down beside him and he said to me...while patting his pillow.....
"Go a seep?"
So I laid down beside him. And as I did, he sat up, placed his favorite blue blanky over my body, laid back down, put his tiny hand in mine and closed his eyes. Tears started coming down my face.
I am so grateful to be a mother. Yes, there are times when I want to pull my hair out. But there are so many moments like this one tonight, where I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father for sending these sweet babies to me. What a divine and sacred calling. I could not ask for anything more.
My dad sent this to me a few weeks ago and it brought tears to my eyes. I thought you all would enjoy it as much as I did.
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